(We interrupt your newspaper reading with Cat and Fox Talk about Random Stuff)

(Cat and Fox are sitting on a random student Chromebook, staring at pictures of Bald Eagles)

CAT: So, what do you think about American birds FO- I mean COPPER?

COPPER (FOX): THAT IS A REALLY BALD BIRD, CA- I MEAN BARTHOLOMEW 

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): Yeah! I think that means all bald people are American, right?

COPPER (FOX): …WHAT?

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): Oh! And by the way, why do we have names now-?

COPPER (FOX): NO GO BACK, HOW DO YOU RELATE THE BALDNESS OF THIS TYPE OF  BIRD TO THE NATIONALITY OF ALL BALD PEOPLE?  

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): Well-

(A Bald Eagle falls in between the two)

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): (gasp) COPPER look! An AMERICAN BIRD! Can it be our new friend?

AMERICAN BIRD: America.

COPPER (FOX): …SURE? BUT WHY DOES IT TALK LIKE THAT?

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): Why do you talk in all caps?

AMERICAN BIRD: (angry red-tailed hawk sound)

COPPER (FOX): …FAIR ENOUGH. ALSO WHERE DID YOU COME FROM?

AMERICAN BIRD: Sky.

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): But where in the sky? 

AMERICAN BIRD: Sky.

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): Ohhhh, okay! Thank you for clarifying my bald friend!

COPPER (FOX): (turns to CAT) …okay so I know his species is called bald eagle, but you do know they are not actually bald right?

BARTHOLOMEW (CAT): …what-

(That concludes this episode of Cat and Fox Talk about Random Stuff. Let us know what you would like them to talk about next, and if you wish to see more from American Bird. And now, back to your regularly scheduled newspaper.)