Crouch’s Couch

Jacob Crouch, Adviser

May 2, 2017

Spring is here again, ladies and gents. The flowers are in bloom, the birds are singing, and the sun is even making an appearance after many months of overcast, gray gloom. The stores are filled with pastel eggs, chocolate rabbits, and other classic symbols of fertility. Look around, folks, and it’s...

Pondering the Idea of School Spirit

Shaken prematurely from his thoughtful fugue, Mr. Crouch gives a surprised, yet menacing, stare.

Jacob Crouch, Adviser

March 27, 2017

High school, it must be said, is an odd concept. The same could really be said for all public schools, I suppose, but we are focused on high school for now, ladies and gents. Students are compelled by law to attend school for roughly six and a half hours per day. They are sorted in many different ways...

Happy Hearts Day, Everyone

Mr. Crouch’s close attempt of a heart is as accurate as your attempt at writing your name in your journal: lame and deserving of condescension.

Jacob Crouch, Adviser

February 10, 2017

The time is upon us for hearts, flowers, overpriced mediocre chocolates, and syrupy messages of affection. Yes, ladies and gents, it's time once again for Valentine's Day. Whether you're involved in a committed relationship or flying solo, prepare to be inundated with sticky-sweet sentimentality from now unti...

Holiday Greetings from Mr. Crouch

Mere words cannot describe the level of disappointment that Mr. Crouch feels with the Catamount staff on a daily basis.

Jacob Crouch, Adviser

January 20, 2017

The holiday season has arrived, ladies and gents. Fake snowmen, evergreen trees, and jolly rotund fellows shall soon proliferate across our shopping malls and television screens. The snow is falling in the mountains (and, if the National Weather Service is to be believed, may fall here in the lowlan...

Crouch’s Couch

Mr. Crouch, as the adviser of the newspaper class, normally keeps his own voice out of the paper. However, the staff decided we wanted an article dedicated to him, and so Crouch's Couch was created.

Jacob Crouch, Adviser

November 22, 2016

The editors of this fine publication, in their infinite wisdom, have seen fit to provide me with a space to muse, ponder, and perhaps occasionally rant. I shall do my level best not to embarrass them too badly. Ladies and gents, the season for giving thanks is once again upon us. Very soon, families...