you’re not falling, the leaves are. they’re tuning bright red like the pain that rages inside of you, but the difference is that they are rotting away and you are not. you are just beginning to bloom. you were certain September intended to swallow you whole but it’s almost thanksgiving and you’re still breathing. you wonder if this is a blessing. (it is). you are not a scarecrow, no matter how many people seem to run, and it’s ok if October tastes like tears and chamomile and pumpkin spice. it’s okay to wish you were a Hallmark movie. the first frost is coming, but nobody will judge you if summer still sleeps under your bed on the cold nights. 

you are stronger than you think, but nobody will judge you if you’re still not ready to let go.

because this time, only the leaves are going to fall.

Written by Phebe Emmanuel ’25